I want to share a secret with you! If you are out there feeling as if you will never get your stuff together with money, you are not alone. Maybe you are late to the game of money management, and feel like everyone you know is closer to the finish line of financial confidence. You probably are comparing your money journey with everyone around you-friends, co-workers, family and even people you don’t know.
Dr. Brene Brown reminds us that the emotions of fear and scarcity immediately trigger us into “comparison mode,” where we are ranking ourselves as “ahead” or “behind” others. This is especially true with money!
While working with clients over the past several years, I have begun to notice a pattern that may surprise you. Those people you may view as extremely successful, and who are earning a solid income, may have nothing in their bank accounts or investments to show for it. On the outside, they are perceived as having their stuff together, but they are living a secret life that is full of shame.
These people are usually too embarrassed to reach out for help. After all, they have been able to climb their career ladders and feel as if they should be able to figure this out for themselves. They tend to use a lack of time as their other favorite excuse.
If this is you, please know you are not alone! You have a peer group that you haven’t been able to connect with, as it’s hard to be faking it while comparing yourself to someone who may be doing the same thing!
If this is you, I want you to know that your financial decisions have had very little to do with intelligence. Being smart does not mean you should have figured this out.
This has NOTHING to do with money!
You’ve probably spent a lot of your energy on avoiding the real culprit-the emotions that you have never come to terms with that have been festering since your early childhood. These feelings can run the gambit between shame, guilt, confusion, to suppressed memories that are unconscious triggers that have yet to be unearthed.
Avoidance has become the shield that has provided a false sense of security. What better way to suppress the negativity than to distract it by creating behaviors that are centered around avoidance. “The avoider” is living in a time vacuum, putting off the truth that will truly be their inner guide to finding their clarity and confidence that has been eluding them.
It’s time to share your secret-to unload the burden of living a life of distraction, to face the unresolved emotions so that the success you have created on the exterior will been genuine and lift you up to your greatest potential.
When you face the unresolved past, you can create a limitless future!
Do you have a secret? It’s time to let it go! I will be your confidant and help you reach the finish line, one step at a time, where you will FINISH STRONG!
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